J
Justin Bariso
Author at EQ Applied | Management Thinker and Doer | Inc. and TIME Contributor
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#EQ #QuestionOfTheDay: Can you be too emotionally intelligent? I'd say, not really. Qualities like empathy can be harmful when let out of control. (Think of those empathetic people who give, give, give...to the point that they completely burn themselves out.) But that's not emotional intelligence. It's just emotional. Emotional intelligence is the ability to make emotions work for you, instead of against you. It still motivates you to show empathy where possible--but not to the point where you harm yourself in the process. (Of course, finding that balance isn't always easy.) But this doesn't mean a high EQ is always "good." Some use the ability to understand and manage emotions to manipulate others for selfish gain. (You might hear this referred to as "the dark side" of emotional intelligence.) So, what's the best defense against being manipulated by those with a high EQ? Work to increase your own. That way, you'll have better chances of recognizing when others use fear, deceit, or other nefarious means to persuade and influence. The takeaway: You can't really have too much emotional intelligence. But if developed without ethics, it can be extremely dangerous.
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